The Story of Pride and Glory

WARNING: THIS POST CONTAINS SOME THINGS THAT ANY NORMAL PERSON WILL FIND EXTREMELY DISGUSTING

I assure you everything I say in this post is true. Videos have been taken of several of the things but I do not have access to them so I can't upload them to youtube yet.

Anyways the story starts out innocent enough. Over the summer my friends were arguing about who would stay up the latest. My friend Andy told my friend Danny that if Danny stayed up later than him he would buy his $6 ticket to a minor league baseball game. But if Andy stayed up later he would get "pride and glory." When he said that he was kind of just joking since pride and glory sounded cool. It didn't really mean anything besides that he would have the glory of staying up later. Well anyways Andy stayed up later so he got pride and glory, even though it really didn't mean anything at that point.
Well he kept braggin about how he had pride and glory so my friend Stacy gave him a really bad wedgie until he "gave" it to her. At that point Pride and Glory became a tangible thing that could be passes from one person to another. If somebody did something impressive or crazy and the person with Pride and Glory approved the new person would then be in possession of Pride and Glory.
So Andy was pissed that Pride and Glory had gone to Stacy so he wanted it back. To get it back he then ate a giant calous that had fallen off of my friends foot, who had been walking around barefoot all day. That by itself is pretty gross, but its nothing compared to what was to come.
I guess Andy got tired of having it (and more so not being able to "win" it back) because he then gave it up to my friend Brian for eating a bunch of hot peppers and not drinking any water to cool it off for 10 minutes. Someone after that point Pride and Glory really turned into Shame and Embarrassment.
Because to get it back from Brian Andy dumped an ashtray from a bar into a glass of beer and drank it. He drank beer mixed with a bunch of ashes, then swallowed a few random cigarette butts on top of it to seal the deal.
Since that was gross that kind of put Pride and Glory on the backburner for a few weeks. Until my friend David broght a girl he liked around my friends at a bar one night. Andy kept hitting on the girl all night so that pissed David off. So to get back at Andy he decided to win Pride and glory from him, since Andy really cared about having it. So to win it back David goes into the bathroom in the bar (a crappy hole in the wall dive bar) to lick the toilet seat, but Andy said that wasn't good enough. So instead they agree that David has to take a bite out of a urinal cake sitting in the urinal in this dirty bar. So he takes it out and takes a bite, and instantly pukes. Well Andy says that didn't count since he puked, so he picks the urinal cake back up and takes a huge bite and swallows it (and was sick for the whole next day), and wins Pride and Glory.
Well David having Pride and Glory really bothered Andy because he is dumb and cares about stupid stuff like this a lot. So he knew he needed to do something extreme to get it back. So they are sitting at their house and they have a weiner dog. Well the weiner dog took a poop in the house. They agree he has to eat a turd. He takes a bite and starts to throw up, so he stops and chugs a beer, then puts another turd in his mouth and begins to chew it. Well this makes David sick and he begins to puke, and runs upstairs to the bathroom, but doesn't make it really and pukes on the wall. For God knows what reason Andy decides on his own that eating the one turd wasn't enough so he eats another one, but yet that still isn't enough for him, so he walks over to the wall and licks the puke my friend had just puked all over the wall. The whole time Kevin is watching alternating between puking out the window and laughin histarically.
So that is where we are at right now. Andy has Pride and Glory for eating dog poop and licking my friends puke. Hopefully it will stop there. We think the name should be changed from Pride and Glory to Shame and Embarrassment or Stupid and Disgusting.
Yes, the people mentioned in this post are my friends. No, I do not know why.
.